Keith Kogane Palmer-TheScientist
by GracefulRavenFeathers
Summary: Title subject to change. Where Keith isn't surprised by the blue lions appearance or being shoved into a Blood Space War. It's just another day in the life of someone from Night Vale. Will continue if people like. One shot for now.
1. Chapter 1

**So this is basically the very beginning of episode 1, but with Night Vale Keith. Keith rescues Shiro, and meets the garrison trio. Also, mildly sentient granola bars**

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Keith sat on the couch in his shack, recounting his explosives. He had to be prepared for...whatever was going to happen tonight. His feelings and theories just couldn't be wrong though. It was something his uncles had instilled in him. Strange feelings were always to be trusted without question.

He stood, shouldered his bag, and walked out to his bike. Keith wondered what could be arriving tonight as he flew. A comet? Aliens? Or…no. It couldn't be him. He shouldn't dare to dream about that. Focus on the mission. Victory or death.

"Woah," Keith muttered to himself as he parked his bike. "Where did that thought come from?" He shrugged it off and planted the bombs. Nothing too harmful, but the perfect distraction-a variety only sold in his hometown, that seemed real from a distance, but up close you could see the multicolored, carnivorous popcorn popping. Rechecking the positioning one last time, he called it good and drove off to where he knew the landing would be.

"Right on time," Keith muttered to himself as he watched the ship crash to the earth. He adjusted his mask and waited for the opportune moment. Garrison professors and soldiers began to swarm the area faster than Keith had anticipated, and he grimaced. He'd always felt uncomfortable around them, as they reminded him of a watered-down version of The Vague, Yet Menacing Government Agency. If your going to be sinister, at least go full out. He would wait until the caravan of high-tech vehicles stopped coming. Then he'd detonate.

The plan went off without a hitch-everyone went to examine his distraction, leaving only a few med techs in Keith's way. After punching his way through, an unexpected sight left him breathless.

"Shiro?"

The man Keith had long considered a brother, who'd been lost in space for a year, was lying unconscious in front of him. The one person who Keith hadn't dreamed of seeing here. Immediately, Keith cut through the bindings with his mother's knife and hoisted Shiro up. He turned to leave.

"Nope! Nope nope nope, I'm saving Shiro!" Keith vaguely recognized the speaker, a kid his age with tanned skin like his Uncle Carlos' and bright blue eyes. He was flanked by two other cadets.

"Um," Keith asked, a little taken aback, "who are you?"

"Uh, the name's Lance!" Keith still couldn't place him. "We're rivals! Ya know, 'Lance and Keith, neck and neck'!"

They had been in the same class…"Oh, I remember you. You're a cargo pilot."

Lance looked offended. "Not anymore!"

"Cargo pilot is nothing to be ashamed of," Keith said as they helped Shiro to the bike. "You need to be brave to tackle those beasts, especially when their poison glands grow in."

The taller boy seemed confused, like he wanted to ask some questions, but another boy(what was his name? Harry? Hunter?) yelped "They're coming back! Mind if we catch a ride with you?"

Keith rolled his eyes and mounted, followed by everyone else. He drove off, pursuit hot on their tail. He was immediately reminded of the time he his friends had broken into the library for fun and had almost got eaten by the Librarians. The stakes weren't as high, but Keith knew how he could lose the chasers.

He took a hard right, trying to ignore how loud everyone was screaming. He found a suitable cliff (coincidentally, The one Shiro himself had taught him how to dive off of), And, just like jumping into the ravine behind the library on his cousin's wheelchair, complete with screams of terror, Keith dove, pulling up just in time to keep from killing everyone.

After parking, he and a shaken up Lance had helped Shiro onto the couch. When the older man woke, Keith gently launched himself at him, and Shiro gasped.

"Keith! What...where?"

"We rescued you!" Keith murmured cheerfully. This was the happiest he had been for a long time. He handed Shiro some clothes. "I think these were my dad's," Keith explained, "they should fit."

Shiro nodded and changed out of the weird clothing. Keith went to grab some granola bars for his friend. When he went off to school, his uncle's had sent him a care package with a lifetime supply of granola bars from The Ralph's, Keith's favorite snack. He also offered some to the other kids.

"I've never seen this brand before," Hunk said, taking a few.

Keith shrugged, and went to go find Shiro. They talked a little, then went inside to find the garrison trio wreaking havoc.

"What, in the name of the Almighty Glow Cloud (All Hail), is going on in here!?"

"THE GRANOLA BAR BIT ME!" Lance shrieked.

"You just have to assert your dominance," Keith said, annoyed. He grabbed the snack by its purple wrapper, growled at it, then tore off a chunk with his teeth. _Some people. It's like they've never seen a mildly sentient granola bar._

All three of the cadets started chattering at once. They were worse than the Whispering Forest. Lance was nearly screaming about "the devil food", Hunk was babbling about "why does the food have fangs!? This is the most terrifying thing that's ever happened!", and Pidge was rattling off just how "scientifically improbable it was that a foodstuff could gain sentience".

"CADETS!" Shiro had to yell to be heard, using what Keith had dubbed The Dad Voice™. The Trio froze, then straightened at Attention. "I know that was exciting-"

"More like terrifying," Hunk mumbled.

"Everything is exciting," Keith countered, "Particularly existence. Existence is the most exciting fact of all."

"BUT, we can't freak out right now. Keith has something to show us."

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 **there ya go. Thanks for all the support!**

 **RN**


	2. Chapter 2

**This is the brainchild of me loving Voltron too much, and listening to way too much Welcome to Night Vale, as well as a tumblr post I can't find anymore. Everything will be explained, and I promise I'll update my other stories soon. I rewrote it, and unfortunately it is like….half the length of the original. However, I hope it is better, and leads to more chapters afterwards. Enjoy.**

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Keith hadn't actually been surprised when he, Shiro, and three other random guys were psychically summoned by an ancient blue warrior cat and thrown into a galactic space war. He'd actually relaxed in the presence of such a normalcy. His uncles had taught him to expect the unexpected-it was the only way to survive.

So he stood in the cockpit of the blue lion, making jabs at Lance's terrible pilot skills. He felt bad forgetting his name, but couldn't apologize due to some stupid rivalry the flamboyant teen had created. He was a little worried about the huge alien ship chasing them through the solar system, but determined it wasn't be the deadliest thing he'd ever encountered.

Then the swirling portal opened up. It was vaguely familiar, giving off the same vibe as the old oak doors. The others paled, wondering what could possibly cause a doorway like that. Lance flinched a little, and told everyone that Blue was telling him to go through

"Shiro," Lance asked shakily, "You're the senior officer here. What should we do?"

The ragtag group consulted before agreeing to follow the alien warship's advice. They dove through, and watched as it closed seconds before their pursuers could follow. Immediately they were surrounded by millions of colors. Hunk gasped, and Lance "oohed".

"This…." Pidge began, "this is incredible!"

Keith shrugged. It was only the regular rainbow of colors, and there weren't even any explosions. "It's alright."

Everyone whirled around, shocked. "What do you mean 'Alright'!?" Lance shrieked. "Its it's a fricking magical _portal_!"

"It's pretty I guess," Keith stated. "But it's just so…" he paused, searching for the right word. "basic." Everyone's jaw dropped, and Keith's brow furrowed. "What? Have you guys never gone through an interdimensional portal before?"

Lance rolled his eyes. "I get it. Mullethead here is pulling our legs, trying to distract us from the fact he's quaking in his extremely unstylish boots. I just didn't realize the Emo Nightmare had a sense of humor."

Keith growled, a deep rumbling sound resonating from his chest. _How dare he insinuate that I'm scared! He's the one who's scared!_ His fingertips and ears were suddenly tinged purple, and Keith clapped a gloved hand over his mouth. _Calm down Keith. No episodes today. Carlos would be so disappointed._

The incident left the other passengers gaping. They couldn't have noticed the purple tinges, but the growl was beyond the human level of noises. The tension was palpable until Shiro broke the silence.

"Did you just growl at Lance, Keith?" the older man asked incredulously, his Dad Mode™ kicking in. Keith was very familiar with Dad Mode™, seeing as Shiro and Adam had taken him under his wing when he got into the Garrison.

Keith couldn't help it-he burst out laughing. That seemed to shock everyone more than the growl.

"Shiro…" he finally managed to stammer through the laughter, "You're such a _Mom Friend!_ "

That got everybody in the cockpit in hysterics, growling incident mostly forgotten. Even Shiro started chuckling after the initial offense wore off. They continued through the portal, and Keith thought about how quickly the past could be forgotten. It reminded him of ending of one of his Uncle's Radio shows.

" _We will always be in that most dangerous, most exciting, most possible time of all-the now."_

Keith smiled, and thought about his little town.

 _Goodnight Night Vale...Goodnight._

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 **I love feedback. Because of it, I made the story flow better. If you want to see more Night Vale Keith, request something and I'll attempt it, or just let me know, and I'll try to continue.**

 **And Hey, thanks for reading.**

 **RN**


	3. Chapter 3

Keith Kogane was walking down main street in Night Vale with his friends Tamika Flynn, Janice Carlsberg, Rodger Harlan, and Josh Crayton. They had just gotten out of school for Spring Break, and were making some big plans.

"So we'll sneak in through this opening," Tamika said, quiet enough that the Sheriff's Secret Police couldn't overhear, while gesturing to a map of the Library and flicking her black cornrows out of her face. She was speaking mainly to Janice, who Keith was wheeling along next to her. Meanwhile, Rodger and Josh were having a loud conversation about their escapades during the school year to throw the NVSSP off their scent. Keith was acting as lookout, making sure the group wasn't jumped by some hooded figures, Secret Policemen, or sentient cacti. He fiddled with his fingerless gloves-a gift from Janice for his birthday-and pretended to be lost in thought.

The group of adolescents had been planning to break into the Library for several weeks. Janice and Rodger wanted to see what it was like inside, because their parents were a bit overprotective. Tamika had exhausted her reading resources, and wanted to test herself. Josh and Keith just wanted to do something reckless, dangerous, and impulsive, like fight some librarians. It was a win/win/win scenario.

So Tamika had managed to find blueprints to the building, and the five teens were compiling strategies for how to get in. They were going over it one last time before the operation that night, careful to remain inconspicuously visible. They were less likely to be questioned or caught if they planned out in the open. The sneakier you acted in Night Vale, the more eyes watched you.

"Keith and Josh will clear the way, knocking out any security cameras and librarians they see," Tamika whispered, then laughed at Josh, who had just shape shifted into an elephant, to make it seem like she was paying attention.

"Then," Janice continued in a whisper as Josh shifted back into a humanoid form with antlers, claws, and wings, "Rodger wheels me in, and you come through as rearguard. The boys take on as many librarians as they can handle, you find as many new books as I can carry, and we escape through the same hole we entered through."

Tamika nodded subtly. "This is going to work. See you all when the sun starts to set. Remember the rendezvous point?"

Keith muttered, "Big Rico's" under his breath, then broke into a wide, albeit forced, grin. Loudly, he exclaimed, "I better get home. Uncle Carlos will be worried."

Josh looked crestfallen, silver eyes filled with false sorrow. "Already?"

"Yeah, you know how he and Uncle Cecil worry if I don't get home from school right away. I'll see you losers later!" Keith placed a soft kiss on Janice's forehead. "See you at dinner, Cuz." Then the 13 year old broke away from the group and headed toward his Uncles' apartment. He knew each of the others would eventually split up and head home.

Carlos wasn't even home when Keith got there. He probably had gotten caught up in his experiments, and lost track of time. Cecil was still at the radio station, as indicated by the deep, familiar voice emanating from the old fashioned radio in their living room. Keith removed his phone from the pocket of his red jacket before taking it off and draping it over the couch. He headed into his bedroom, unsheathing his knife as he went.

Leaving the door open, he sat down at the edge of his twin bed, studying the blade. He unwrapped the hilt and stared at the glowing purple emblem. His Uncle Cecil had mentioned that it was from Keith's Mother, and had some interesting properties. Once, when Keith had been training with it, it had morphed into a full length sword. He wasn't sure how it worked, and hadn't been able to make it happen since. The ghostly light illuminated the dark room, revealing his black walls covered in sentient galaxies, and half-made red and purple bedspread.

Then Carlos entered the apartment, startling Keith out of his thoughts. The man was wearing his usual red-and-black flannel shirt under his lab coat. His dark hair was getting long, almost brushing is broad shoulders. He looked tired to Keith.

"Keith?" he called. "You home?"

"Yeah, I'm in my room."

Keith's uncle came in, looking down fondly at his young charge. "Hey kiddo. Sorry I wasn't here. Nilanjana has a case of the throat spiders, so I had to do her job as well. Cecil's on his way." Keith nodded, a little surprised. He must've zoned out for longer than he realized. Checking his phone, he realized he'd been home for close to an hour.

"You okay, Keith?" Carlos asked, sinking down to sit next to the half-human teenager.

"Yeah…" Keith said quietly. "Just thinking about my mom." Carlos nodded solemnly. He seemed like he was about to say something, but was cut off by Cecil's entrance.

"Honey I'm hoooooooooooome!" he shrieked, flicking his white and purple bangs out of his third eye. Keith noted that he was wearing one of his more mild outfits-a black and chartreuse bedazzled crop top hoodie with the sleeves rolled up to show off his sentient tattoos, a pair of hot-pink camouflage patterned warm-up pants, and some blood-red pumps with one navy sock and one turquoise sock with cacti printed on it. His glasses were sliding down his nose, but he didn't seem to notice or care. He leapt at his husband, narrowly missing Keith.

"Honey," Carlos said pointedly, "We're having dinner at Abby's tonight."

That immediately killed Cecil's mood. "Will... _Steve_...be there?" The radio announcer covered his nephew's ears when he said Steve's name, as if it were a swear word. Keith rolled his eyes.

"Well it is his house, Ceec."

"Ugh, do I have to?"

"Yes…?"

"But he is the woooorst!"

"Cecil Gershwin Palmer-TheScientist!" Carlos exclaimed grumpily. "You are a grown man! Surely you can tolerate your brother-in-law for one meal! You know full well why we do this once a month-so Keith and Janice can hang out, and so we can grow closer as a family."

Cecil wilted at his husband's harsh tone. He looked between Carlos and Keith, muttered an apology, and went to go feed Khoshekh. Keith was surprised-Carlos barely ever raised his voice. Especially not to Cecil. He must be tired. Now that Keith looked harder at his uncle, he realized that there was more gray in his hair than earlier in the month. That though alone almost made Keith want to forgo the Library Break-in. Almost.

Carlos stood, ruffled Keith's hair, and went to get ready for dinner. The teen watched his Uncle shuffle out, and sheathed his knife.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hi guys. Hope I got the glitches out. Enjoy part two of the shenanigans.**

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Dinner at the Carlesburg's was always an interesting affair. Keith and Janice sat next to each other, watching the chaos enfold. It would start off ok-Carlos complimenting Abby's cooking, Cecil glaring daggers at Steve, Keith and Abby taking bets on how long it would take for the relative peace to disintegrate.

Then Cecil threw Steve a thinly veiled insult, and Steve replied with a seemingly innocent comment about Cecil's outfit. Suddenly, a spoonful of luminescent mashed potatoes sailed through the air and splattered against Steve's polo shirt. There was a deafening silence for a few seconds, then Carlos stood.

"Cecil, love of my life, please put the potatoes down."

Keith tried his hardest not to laugh, but as he and Janice made eye contact, they both lost it. Janice's face was bright red as she giggled, and tears ran down Keith's cheeks as he barely contained a short. He passed a few bucks to his cousin, who smugly stuck it in her pocket.

"May," Janice tried to ask in between gasps, "May Keith and I...hahaha...be excused? We wanted to get a head start on a break reading challenge. You know how ugly the teachers get when their challenges aren't completed. Toby Mathews still can't hear with his right ear or feel anything in his left arm."

"Of course Starlight," Steve said, still glaring at his brother-in-law.

"I think Ceec and I are gonna head home," Carlos stated. "Abby, thanks again for the delicious meal. I'll have to get you're vegan meatloaf recipe sometime, cause what you did with that bioluminescent algae was incredible." He turned to his nephew. "Will you be ok walking home yourself?"

"Of course," Keith replied. Internally, he was overjoyed that this has worked out so well, but he contained his emotions to a small grin. "I'll see you guys at home in a couple hours?"

Cecil nodded and rubbed Keith's hair affectionately before shooting one last glare at Steve and an awkward wave at Abby. He followed his husband out of the house, clinging to his lab coat.

Keith and Janice went into her bedroom. They waited until Abby checked on them after cleaning up, then put their plan into action. Keith carefully lifted his cousin from her wheelchair and set her on her bed. He folded her chair into a tiny metal triangle that fit in his pocket. He then silently climbed out the open window with her on his back. Once out, they returned the wheelchair to its regular form, and they took off towards Big Rico's Pizza.

Tamika and Josh were already waiting at the Pizza Parlor. Josh was sporting blood red hair that matched his eyes and black angel wings that matched his hoodie. Tamika was flipping through Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice, probably looking for backup plans in case their's failed. After a couple minutes, Rodger ran up.

"Sorry I'm late," he gasped. "All the lampposts on 2nd decided to tapdance, so I had to make a detour."

"It's all good," Josh replied. "Everyone have your weapons?"

Keith glanced around, shifting his knife from hand to hand. Janice was checking the tips of her arrows and expanding her collapsible bow. Tamika's book bag was filled with Dickens, Shakespeare, and Thoreau. Rodger had a length of rope tied around his waist that he used as a whip, a garrotte, and a noose all in one. Josh didn't have a weapon, but Keith had seen how fast a wicked set of claws, horns, or teeth could appear.

"Alright then," Keith said with a grin. "Let's do this thing."

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 **Hope you guys enjoyed it. If you did, I'd really appreciate a fav, follow, or review. They make my day.**

 **Also, i made a few changes to my profile. I changed my pen name, and I'm going to delete old stories I don't like.**

 **-Feathers**


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